A Reason

I woke up this morning with a sense of helplessness. Just feel that everything's wrong, that nothing can get me excited these days. Walking to my office -the one that I still can't make myself feel comfortable with- I had this thought of gratefulness. It's a long long time the last day I truly offer my prayers with sincere gratefulness. Then I said this simple prayer: "will you give me a reason to be grateful today? me, the long lost child still searching the right way home to my heavenly father..."

And He answered me right away. He, the one I often denied when things get unbearable and disapointment get insufferable, answered my simple ungrateful prayer offered in the most unacceptable way. I check my e-mail and have this e-mail I've been waiting since yesterday saying:

Congratulations! You passed the 2007 Financial Risk Manager^® Examination.

Man!!! I passed my exam and soon have the right to add the magic "FRM" stuff behind my name!!! Since I know for sure that I'm not that smart, not that hardworker person people always assume me to be... then... well... then this is more than a reason to be grateful.


A shame on me, asking for a reason to be grateful while he always supplies me with everything I should have always been grateful for. Can't say better words than a mere thanks to my beloved Jesus: thanks for my life, for my beloved ones, for getting me safe and sound through  it all, for helping me passing this exam (I know this exam means nothing to you, Lord, but you understand that it means a lot to me, don't you?). Thanks to my beloved sister: you're always there, sist, how can I not love you? can't believe you're 5 years younger than me, feel like you're my older sister sometimes:D. Thanks to my mama: there's always a prayer for me, right, mama? Thanks to my friends in the office: you're the ones who had to suffer the worst of me, eh?

And finally, yes it all comes back to you, lord, for the glory of your name.

--lagi mellow.... gue udah nyaris punya FRM designation!!!!--